So…the day big day is almost here…you’re getting nervous…and you’re completely stressed out! It seems that in the last few days people all of a sudden appear to ask you if you’ve done this…or if you’ve thought of that…when you are obviously on the brink of losing it. Be assured that with any wedding there are always problems to be resolved, last minute things to do, and lots of people “trying to help” but really just driving you crazy in the last days or weeks before your wedding. Here are a fews ways to make sure that you make down the alter without having a breakdown:
- Remember the purpose: In the last few days, there are so many things that you are doing and finishing, it is easy to get caught up in all of the details and forget what you are actually doing…you are marrying the person of your dreams! In the end, it’s not about whether the napkins are not folded perfectly, or the chair covers are a shade off, it’s about celebrating you and your future spouse! Even though you are busy, find some time to be together, even if it is just meeting for a quick lunch, or taking an hour to do something fun together, it will remind you of what is really important. When you are taking time for each other, there should only be ONE rule…no wedding talk. Finding a way to stay connected during the pre-wedding craziness will help you to relieve some of the stress.
- Make a list: With so much going on, it is way too easy to forget something. Keep a detailed list of what needs to be done. Don’t be depressed at how much there is to do, at least when you have a good list, when someone asks if there is anything they can do to help, you can find something on the list for them to do.
- Spend some time with your peeps: If you have last minute things to do, gather a group of your closest friends or family members for a last minute to-do party. Invite people that you really love to hang a around with. If you are laughing and having fun, you’ll get things done and de-stress at the same time.
- Make some time to be alone: In the last few days, you have people over all the time, and people calling you 24/7. Take some time to just be alone for a few minutes. Even if it means going for a quick jog, a tanning session, or going to the store on your own…just do it. If you have a few minutes alone, you can gather your thoughts and be in a better mood to deal with everything.
- Get some sleep: With so much going on, sleep seems like a luxury but most people do not deal well with stress when they are sleep deprived. Get help with things or delegate tasks if need be, but do not stay up all night. Without sleep, you’ll just be cranky, emotional, and you won’t be looking your best.
It may seem inconceivable right now, but you will get through it, and it is worth all of the work. The most important thing is to enjoy the whole experience because it really does go by fast.
No mater what aspect of your wedding, finding the right vendor is extremely important. The right vendors will work with you to make things perfect. In addition, your vendors can really help you stay on budget, offer advice, and provide suggestions based on their experiences. Here are some tips and things to consider when choosing your wedding vendors:
- Get referrals: If you know someone who has recently been married, talk to them and see if there are vendors that they would recommend. In addition, ask them what they liked and disliked about their wedding vendors because what may be really important to them may not be quite as essential to you. If you don’t know anyone who’s getting married or has recently gotten married, you can look online. There are plenty of forums with brides discussing the vendors they’ve used. One caveat is to read vendor reviews with caution. Although the reviews can be extremely helpful, you need to understand that some people are almost impossible to please. Also, keep in mind that there are always two sides to every story. The vendor may have done things the way they understood them to be, but the bride may not have communicated things exactly the way she had envisioned them. We’ve all know some “bridezillas” who are extremely tough on their vendors, so keep this in mind.
- Talk to at least 3 vendors before making a decision: Talking to a number of different vendors for each item will help you to choose the right people for you. There are just some vendors that you will connect with and for some reason you’ll just know that you are on the same page with things. Even if the first vendor you talk to seems like the perfect match, I would still recommend seeing some other vendors because you may get some good suggestions, and budget saving ideas. If you are still convinced that the first person was the right one, you’ll gain some confidence in your decision. When talking to vendors communicate what you expect to the best of your abilities. In order to ensure that you are satisfied, you need to make sure that they understand what it is that you are looking for. The more specific you can be, the better. Good communication will also ensure that the quote that they provide you will be as accurate as possible. If you don’t know exactly what it is you want, don’t be afraid to ask for suggestions and work out the details using their experience, you preferences, and the budget. Just make sure that when you are done going through everything that you are both on the same page and that you feel positive about what has been decided.
- Don’t make price the only factor: Although the budget is very important, it should not be the only factor in your decision. When comparing price, however, make sure that you are not comparing apples to oranges. You’ll need to consider everything that is included. Are there extra items or services offered by a vendor? In addition, you need to consider the vendor’s reputation, their willingness to answer your questions, their openness to working with you, and your ability to communicate well with each other.
- Honesty: The best vendors will tell you up front if there is something that cannot do for you, if they don’t think that you would be satisfied with something, of if there is something that they can suggest that might be a better option for you. Personally, I would rather deal with a vendor who is honest and up front with me. What I don’t like are the vendors who promise things and then cannot deliver, or increase the price significantly than originally discussed to deliver on their original promises.
- Think things over: In most cases choosing vendors can be difficult because you are afraid that they will be booked if you don’t make up your mind right away, but take at least some time to think it over. Once you’ve decided on a vendor, you generally need to make some kind of deposit, so changing vendors later on can cost you. In addition, it can be stressful to run around at the last minute to find a new vendor if you need to make a change. Take a little time and be confident about your decision.
When talking to vendors, communicate your expectations clearly, keep an open mind, and you will find the best people for your wedding.
If you are looking to save money, one of the best ways is to try and save money on some of the smaller items. Cake toppers can add a lot to the look of your wedding cake, but they can also be very expensive. It seems silly to spend a lot of money on a cake topper because really you’ll only use it once and in the scheme of things, it is really just a small detail. Here are some ideas to help you save money on a cake topper:
- Monogram or Word Cake Topper: If you are looking to have your initials on the cake, you can buy the letters; however, they can be expensive. Instead, you can go to the local craft store or even the dollar store and find wood letters for less than one dollar. In some cases you can find whole words that are related, love, trust, etc. From there, you spray paint them in whatever color suits your wedding. Make sure you dry them completely and air them out to take away an unpleasant odor. The only other thing that needs to be done is to drill some small wholes in them and stick some skewers in the holes so that they can be inserted into the cake. When your done you’ll have a very cheap cake topper that looks very professional. The one thing to remember is to make sure that the lettering or words that you use will fit on the top tier of your cake.
- Use fresh flowers or flower petals: Fresh flowers can make a great cake topper without a lot of money or effort. You can ask your florist to add this to your list of wedding flower list. You will need to either coordinate with your cake person and florist or get the flowers in advance so that your cake person can decorate with them in advance.
- Chocolate leaves or flowers: Using molded chocolate shapes can be a great way to decorate your cake. Ask your cake person, a lot of them can do this type of work or ask your local chocolate or candy store. Generally, the chocolates are available in a variety of colors and shapes. You may be surprised how inexpensive these can be.
- Personalize with pictures: If you have a nice picture of the two of you, you can easily use it to decorate your cake. For this topper, go to the craft or dollar store and find some swirl sticks. These are generally metallic sticks with swirl at the top to hold paper or pictures. Sometimes the sticks have bases to help them stand on their own. If this is the case, simply cut the base with wire cutters. Then you can insert your favorite photo into the swirl and insert the stick part into your cake.
- Check out online stores, forums, and auctions: Because you don’t generally re-use these items, you can often find used toppers or can find brand new toppers for reasonable prices.
No matter what type of cake topper you choose, talk to your cake person about your choice. Your baker may be able to suggest something or make sure that your idea will compliment the look of your cake. Also, because your guests will be eating the cake, make sure that anything you use is clean and sanitary.
Candles may be the most affordable, available, and versatile items to use as wedding favors. Some of the best things about using candles include that they come in every color, they can be found at affordable prices, and that there are so many ways to use them. One important caveat, however, is to be careful of the scent. If you have a room with 100 scented candles with a large group of people and food, the fragrance may be overwhelming and can be unpleasant for some guests. Here are some great ideas for using candles for your favors, but maybe consider using unscented candles:
- Simple votive candle, wrapped with tulle and tied with ribbon - to make this favor personalized, either wrap a label around the candle or add a card to the ribbon with your names or a special message.
- Sand/shell candle for a beach themed wedding – Buy inexpensive champagne flutes or small glasses (you can find them at the dollar store), sand, and find some small seashells. Mix the sand and shells, pour the sand/shell mix into the glasses, put in a candle wick, and melt a layer of candle wax over. The design is a layered beach themed favor that can also add a lot to your table decor. To personalized, you can buy glasses/champagne flutes with your name or message online for pretty affordable prices.
- Simple shot glass favor to suit your decor - Find inexpensive shot glasses, glass stones in your wedding colors, and small candles that will fit in the shot glasses. First, place a few colored stones in each glass and place the candle on top. Make sure that the candle fits tightly, as this will hold everything in place. It’s a great little wedding favor that will go with any type of theme / color.
- Gel Candle for your theme - If you are into the craft / diy thing, this may be a good option. First find a small glass container (could be a shot glass, mini glass, or candle holder), find something inflammable that represents the theme of your wedding (seashells, metal hearts, small ornaments), and buy candle gel mix. It is important to follow the gel candle mix directions to avoid air bubbles and problems, but clear candle gel, with a wick and suspended ornaments can make a great wedding favor. If you are really talented, you can find small metal letters that represent your names to insert into the gel candle.
- Red Wine /Champagne gel candle – For this favor you just need to find mini champagne flutes and/or wine glasses, and find the appropriate gel candle color. Just follow the instructions, put in the wick and pour in the gel candle mix. This is a simple favor, but may work well with the theme of your wedding. If you like this idea, you can also look into purchasing a ready made version.
- Unique Candle in Simple Box - If you are looking to keep things simple, you can always find a unique candle that you love or that really goes well with your theme. Generally, these types of candles come in great small little gift boxes so they are ready to go!
Candles are great because you can either buy great candle favors, make them yourself, or add a unique touch to a ready made favor. This type of favor can be suitable to any type of wedding or wedding budget, just be creative!
Similar to all other wedding decisions, planning your wedding flowers takes time and a lot of thought. Obviously you want your flowers to coordinate well with your decor, fit in your budget, and look fantastic, but you will also want to consider the following:
- Will you be hiring a florist or doing the flowers yourself? Putting a bouquet together may not seem very difficult, but it can be more complicated than it looks. First, you need to practice well in advance to make absolutely sure that you and/or your family/friends can do the job. Then, I would recommend that you have lots of help. If you are using fresh flowers, it will not be something that can be done well in advance and there is so much to do at the very last minute that you will need help.
- Are you going for silk or the real thing? First, you need to understand that throughout the day the bouquets take a lot of abuse. Depending on the season, the flowers can be exposed to either really cold situations or very hot temperatures. Also, the flowers get waved around, pushed around, and in some cases dropped on the ground. Fresh flowers are wonderful, but you need to understand that you may not have the perfect flowers at the end of the night. With fresh flowers, you must also realize the fact that they may not be 100% perfect, or exactly the color that you had in mind. With silk flowers, you must think about how important it is for them to look real. Silk flowers that look very real can in a lot of cases cost more than real flowers. In addition, if you are purchasing silk flowers and are ordering online or without seeing them in advance, make sure that you can return them or order a sample, as the quality and colors may vary. The choice of real or silk flowers really depends on the person and the setting of the wedding, but either one can work well.
- What colors are you looking for? If you are looking at real flowers, you may want to choose natural colors. Many florists will tell you that flowers can be dyed, and this is a good option for arrangements, but beware, there may be problems in stopping the ink from leaking on to your white dress. With flowers you will also want to consider that trying to match colors too much may be difficult. I would suggest choosing a complementary color instead of trying to find an exact match.
- Are the flowers in season? Not only will choosing flowers that are in season save you money because they are more readily available, but they may also be nicer flowers. Trying to find exotic flowers may limit the suppliers, which means higher costs. In addition, if the flowers have to come from further away, the flowers may be less fresh. The last thing you want on your wedding day is to have your flowers arrive with brown spots.
- Can the flower arrangements be used for the ceremony and the reception? If you are looking for ways to save money, try to use as many of the decorations in both areas. Generally, flower arrangements are easy to load and place at the reception venue. Often you can have a close friend of family member with a larger vehicle do this if you don’t have a decorator. Beyond saving money, using the flower for both also bring continuity to the event.
- Will you be keeping the arrangements? If you are planning on keeping the bouquet, find out in advance the best way to preserve and/or dry the flowers. Don’t just put them on the counter on the night of your wedding, as this may ruin the bouquet.
- How many flowers/arrangements will you need? Flowers can be used to decorate the ceremony, the tables, can be given as favors, and are generally a part of the wedding party’s attire. Beyond that, corsages are often given to the mothers and/or grandmothers of bride and groom. It is also common for the fathers and grandfathers of the bride and groom also receive a boutonniere. Before making floral arrangements, make sure that you know what you will need. With flowers, you can often save money by buying in bulk.
Flowers provide great decor, and are usually a considerable portion of your wedding budget. Take the time to consider the options and make sure that you get the perfect wedding flowers.